Legendary Psychologist Marsha Linehan knows a lot about acceptance and how crucial it is to change.
The first step, in fact.
In order to change who/what you are, you must first accept who/what you are. You have to accept reality in order to change it. Reality is what it is. If you don’t like it, you can change it.
- Marsha Linehan, Building a Life Worth Living
This idea of acceptance, for some, seems so counter to getting the body (or anything else) we desire. So let’s get more clear on what the heck we are talking about: Acceptance is admitting the truth about facts as they are in any given moment.
Acceptance means that you let go of fighting reality.
What facts are you fighting right now?
What reality are you resisting the truth of?
Radical acceptance means every bit of you is open to fully experiencing what IS, in this moment. With that said, to some extent, mindfulness practices help with acceptance.
One key element that Marsha talks about in her memoir, and which I find people often misunderstand is that “To accept something is not the same as judging it as being good.”
If these two are not the same, what can you list as the differences?
When you can radically accept how something is- your body, your size, your shape- when you willingly accept how it is right now, without resentment, you will be in a place to move on. As Marsha says, to radically accept something is to stop fighting it.
Are these ideas what you had in mind when it comes to “acceptance”? Take some time with a journal (or a napkin) and jot down your answers to the questions above. Writing it out will allow your brain to mull it over a little longer (than just thinking about it).
How might the process of accepting yourself be different than how you thought of it before?
Once you’ve explored these questions,